My friend Carl had recently hired an incredible cook. Carl and I got into an argument about whether his cook was a better cook than me--I'm a restaurant consulting chef, and I write cookbooks.

We gave a party to resolve the issue. I set up one buffet table, Carl's cook the second. We invited a bunch of friends and got them to sample as much food as possible. Then we had all the guests vote.

It was five for Carl's cook, five for me, and nine abstentions---a dead heat!

It was frustrating--we'd bet quite a bit on the outcome. Carl and I started arguing again.

"Your cook can't be that great, " I joked, "Look how thin you and Carl are!"

"He cooks us great diet meals, " said Carl, "but if he wanted to he could fatten us up. Hell, he could fatten up the Taylor twins."

Jeff and Joey, their mouths full of hor d'oeuvres, looked up sheepishly as he said that. It was kind of a running joke that the two identical twins were always eating, though they were quite slim.

"No way, " Jeff said finally, "we have high metabolisms."

I looked at them for a minute. They always got invited to all the parties, because they were so beautiful. But unfortunately they were kind of crabby and stand-offish, as if they were so into being twins that they looked down on anyone who wasn't one of them.

"I don't know about Carl's cook, " I said, "but I could fatten you up easily, if I put my mind to it."

"No you couldn't, " said Joey, "though I wish you would try."

Both boys laughed at this.

"There you go, " said Carl, "that's the perfect contest. I'll feed one twin, you feed the other. After, I don't know, a month, we'll weigh them. I'll bet my twin gains more weight than yours."

Everyone laughed uproariously at this absurd idea, the twins more than anyone.

"That makes sense, " I said, "they're identical twins, so the only variable will be the cooking...you're on. Which twin do you want?"

"Take your pick."

"I'll take Jeff, " I said.

"Excuse me?" said Jeff, laughing, "Hello? You're presuming a hell of a lot! Why do you think we'll cooperate?"

"Well, " I said, "that's part of the challenge, isn't it? We have to cook such tantalizing food that you come over and eat every day, and go on eating even if you start gaining weight."

"Exactly, " said Carl, "and no bribing allowed, by the way...the food alone must tempt them."

"I agree, " I said.

"But we do need their cooperation to some extent. We have to weigh them, after all."

"Oh, right, " I said, "what would you boys charge to allow yourselves to be weighed, once when the bet starts, and once a month later?"

The two looked at each other in amazement. They were just starting to realize that Carl and I were serious.

"That's all we'd have to do?" asked Joey, "weigh ourselves?"

"Right."

"We wouldn't have to agree to eat anything?"

"Nope, " said Carl, "but just remember, Joey, my cook will feed you anything you want, anytime of the day or night, for the duration of the bet."

"And you can eat at my place anytime, " I told Jeff.

"Okay, " said Joey, "our weighing fee is a thousand dollars apiece, each time you weigh us."

"Are you actually considering this?" Jeff asked Joey.

"Why not?"

"But they're just joking."

"Here, " I said, making his out a check for two thousand dollars, "here's your weighing fee in advance. That's how serious I am."

Jeff gaped at the check. Carl made out one for Joey.

We started the next day. Since the twins liked to eat together, we arranged to feed them three meals a day, alternating between my house and Carl's.

We started out at Carl's house. The boys wore jocks to be weighed in (a compromise between modesty and accuracy).

They were slender, but not skinny. Their bodies were nice and curvy, and fleshed out enough so that their ribs didn't show.

Joey weighed 160, Jeff 159. They were both a sexy 5'10".

"Don't worry, Jeff, " I joked, "you'll soon pass him up."

"Forget it, " said Jeff, "I'll see you in a month. I'm not eating a bite."

"I thought you said it would be fun."

"But the more I think about it, the more it seems creepy. I kind of feel like you're using us...I don't like it."

"Don't you want to even try the Lobster Meridian? I've been working on it all day."

I'd noticed at a dinner party a few months earlier that Jeff couldn't get enough Lobster Meridian.

It stopped his. He turned around and eyed it pensively.

Joey had already started in on the spread that had been laid out for his.

"Well, " said Jeff, "I guess a meal or two wouldn't hurt...but I'm not going to gain weight, I hate to tell you."

He sat down and started in on the Lobster Meridian.

For the first few days of this strange bet the boys, Jeff especially, tried to act blasé, showing up late and eating lackadaisically, as if they were just going through the motions out of obligation.

But they never missed a meal. And they loved the food and the attention, and soon found it too much trouble to contain their enthusiasm. Soon they were showing up eagerly several minutes early, to wait impatiently and eat rapturously when they were finally served.

Carl and I naturally tried to figure if they were gaining any weight, and, more importantly, whether one was gaining more than the other.

But they stayed quite slender. They typically wore T-shirts and cutoffs that showed off their figures pretty well, so it would have been apparent if they had put on weight.

Still, I didn't give up hope--I noticed that their capacities were increasing.

Carl's feeding practice was to surround Joey with numerous platters overflowing with fattening food, much more than he could ever eat at a sitting--I guess his theory was that way he could eat an enormous amount without it ever seeming like an enormous amount.

And if he wanted anything that he hadn't been served, Carl would have it prepared for his as soon as possible.

My method with Jeff was more subtle. I fed his one dish at a time, and even kept his waiting a bit between courses. I figured he'd eat more if I strung the process out a bit, and made each meal like an epic adventure where he never knew what was coming next. I saved the more enticing, original dishes for the end, coaxing his to eat more and more with the promise that he would be rewarded by ever more exotic eating experiences.

This was much trickier than Carl's method--if I timed things wrong, or happened to serve something he didn't like, he would become bored and leave without eating all that much. So at first, Jeff ate less than Joey.

But as I strived ever harder to pique his appetite, carefully monitoring his response to each dish, composing symphonically intricate combinations of taste and timing, he plainly started enjoying the experience more and more.

When we started out, they both took about fifteen minutes for breakfast, half an hour for lunch, and just a bit over half an hour for dinner.

After a week, Joey was spending an additional five to ten minutes at each meal. Jeff, on the other hand, was still spending fifteen minutes for breakfast (he didn't have the patience for a strung-out procedure in the morning, so I just fed his normally), but almost an hour for lunch. And dinner would take an hour and a half.

"Oh my God!" he said one evening, "Tacquitos!"

It was the ninth day of the bet. He'd been eating for almost an hour and a half. Tacquitos were one of his favorite dishes, but I hardly ever served them.

"You sadist, " he moaned, patting his bloated belly, which strained painfully against his cutoffs.

"Those look awfully tight, " I said, "why don't you unbutton them?"

"I guess I'd better, " he said, following my suggestion and letting his belly ease out, "though it really screws up my denial!"

He grinned and started on the tacquitos.

"What, have you been telling yourself you could do this without gaining weight?"

"Yes, " he said, "but actually, gaining weight itself doesn't bother me--mmmmm, Jesus, these tacquitos are even better than last time..."

"Gaining weight doesn't bother you?"

"...um, no, it's just all the smug expressions and smart-ass remarks I'll get as soon as everybody notices I'm gaining weight."

"Oh, that's easy, " I said, "just tell them you're getting fat on purpose."

"What!?"

"Well, if you get fat involuntarily they'll feel smugly superior, feeling like they have more will-power and self-control than you do. But if you get fat intentionally, what can they possibly say?"

"They'll say I'm out of my mind! Why would I want to get fat?"

"I don't know. Think of something. How much weight have you gained, anyway?"

"You want me to weigh myself now? Have you forgotten about the thousand-dollar weighing fee?"

"Oh yeah. Well, I guess I'll just wait till the end of the month."

"Oh well. Anyway, that's it for the tacquitos. What's next?"

I brought out some brandied bon-bons, which he devoured with enthusiasm.

"What a great appetite you have tonight!" I said.

"I know!" he said happily, "unbuttoning those cutoffs really helps. You'd better get started on the next course..."

The next day he kept his cutoffs buttoned all through breakfast and through lunch until his brother left.

"Ooof!" he said when he finally unbuttoned them, "I'm going to have to get some new clothes."

At dinnertime he had to unbutton them by the second course.

"Putting on a little weight?" teased Joey when he noticed.

"Well, I'm still a bit bloated from lunch--I ate really well at lunch time. But I've probably put on some weight. Don't tell me you haven't."

"Maybe a few pounds, " admitted Joey, who, though he wasn't quite keeping up with Jeff, was eating extremely well.

A few minutes later Joey unbuttoned his cutoffs too.

"Oh, that feels much better."

By the end of the third week it was obvious that they'd both filled out a bit. And if they stood next to one another, you could tell that Jeff had filled out the most. In desperation, Carl tried to copy my slow feeding method, but Joey wouldn't put up with it--he was used to stuffing himself on whatever he wanted, and wouldn't eat at all until he got it.

One night, at a party, I overheard someone talking to Joey.

"You and your brother are the lives of the party!" he said, "you seem so much more cheerful and, well, nicer than usual..."

"Yeah, " said someone else, "what gives?"

"I don't know, " said Joey, "maybe it's just that we're finally getting enough to eat..."

It was true...their dispositions had improved remarkably. I was even starting to like them. Especially because they were getting sexier every day they way they were filling out.

One evening I made a pass at Jeff, who seem shocked.

"Don't be ridiculous!" he said.

"Why is it ridiculous?"

"Well...uh...we've known each other for years, and we never...it's just too weird to start doing that at this point!"

He left in a huff. But he wasn't too upset over it--he came back the next day with a better appetite than ever.

Who do you think is going to win?" I asked Carl. It was the day of the final weighing. Carl and I were waiting for the twins to show up.

"I don't know, " he said, "you may have been ahead there for a bit, but Joey's appetite has been really good this week. We might be in for a surprise."

The twins had been wearing baggy clothes lately, so it was hard to tell who was heavier--but when they showed up in their jocks, there was no doubt.

Joey's jock was tight, and little bulges of fat formed at its boundaries. There was a slight jiggle to his flesh as he walked which hadn't been there before.

But Jeff's jock was so tight he had to hold on to the top so his breasts wouldn't pop out. He had bulges in all the same places as Joey, but they were clearly more pronounced. And while Joey's stomach had acquired a noticeable softness, Jeff had the beginnings of a cute little pot-belly.

"Sam? Oh, Sa-am!"

I had been so absorbed in gaping at Jeff I hadn't realized they'd been talking to me. The twins laughed.

"Are you going to go get the scale, or what?"

"Is it really necessary?" I said, "It's obvious that I've won."

"I paid a thousand dollars to weigh Joey, " said Carl, "and I'm going to weigh his, damn it."

Joey stepped hesitantly on the scale, which registered 173.

"That's thirteen pounds, " said Carl, "not bad."

Then it was Jeff's turn. With trepidation and an embarrassed smile, he stepped on the scale.

"178!" I exclaimed, "Nineteen pounds! Pay up, loser!"

Sourly, Carl started making out a check.

"You little piggy, you!" Joey said to Jeff, laughing, "Not that I'm a model of restraint, " he added with a sigh, patting his slightly-pudgy tummy, "I'm glad this is over. My boyfriend has been complaining."

"What?" said Carl, "you have a boyfriend?"

"Yep."

"And you don't?" he asked Jeff.

"Nope."

"That's not fair!" he said, "my twin has been under pressure to keep his weight down, and yours hasn't!"

"I don't think it made any difference, " said Joey.

"But how can you me sure? This cancels the bet!"

"No way!" I said, "our bet has no provisions about boyfriends. How could it? We can't cage them like lab rats. Besides, I won by a big margin. The boyfriend can't have made that much difference."

"Well, " said Carl, "I'll pay you, but only if you agree to swap twins and repeat the bet for another month."

"Oh yes!" chorused the twins. They turned to me and pleaded with me to agree.

"But I thought you just said you were glad it was over, " I said to Joey.

"I was trying to talk myself into being glad, but really, this has been the best month of my life. I love eating this wonderful food!"

"Me too, " said Jeff. He patted his little tummy for emphasis, "if that isn't already obvious. And I'm curious about Jake's cooking. Joey's been raving about it all month."

"But you're going to get fat!" I said.

"You forget, " said Joey, "we have high metabolisms. As soon as we quit eating this we'll get back to normal in no time."

"Oh, like it even matters, " said Jeff, "who cares about getting fat, when you can eat like we've been?"

"I thought you were worried about what other people thought."

"Oh! I've been using your advice. Whenever anyone says anything about my weight, I act like I've been complemented and tell them I'm so happy I've finally been able to put on a few pounds. It completely baffles them!"

"And Joey--what about your boyfriend? I thought he doesn't like your weight gain."

"That's his problem!"

I shrugged.

"Well, it's okay with me."

We resumed feeding the twins the next day.

"How come you let him feed you one dish at a time?" complained Carl to Joey as I started feeding his my way.

"That's the only way he'll do it, " said Joey, shrugging.

Carl and Jake tried feeding Jeff using my method, but they didn't have it down. He ate so little that Carl reverted to his normal style, and let his eat whatever he wanted.

The twins ate better than ever, and were happy as clams.

The month was over. Carl looked glum as the two plump boys arrived to be weighed. They looked identical again, with matching pot-bellies, love-handles, chubby thighs, rounded bottoms, and lovely, jiggly pecs.

"New jocks?" I observed.

"We couldn't fit in the old ones if you paid us, " smiled Jeff, gingerly stepping on the scale. It stopped at 190.

"Twelve pounds, " sighed Carl, "not that great."

"I think it gets harder to gain as I get fatter, " consoled Jeff.

Joey weighed 191.

"My God!" he said, "Eighteen pounds in a month? I didn't realize I gained that much!"

Carl grumpily wrote me out another check.

"You sure you don't want to swap us and do it for another month?" asked Jeff, "your cook is getting pretty good, Carl. He may catch up with Sam."

"Forget it!" said Carl, "you just want Sam to feed you for another month."

"Either one can feed me any time, " said Jeff.

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. Very soon after we stopped feeding the twins their old crabby personalities came back.

But the big surprise was the lawsuit they served me and Carl with.

"Wow, " my lawyer said when I brought him the case, "you're being sued for manipulating the plaintiffs into getting fat against their will, damages in the amount of 200 thousand...this is a new one on me."

"But it's not true!" I said, "They were willing!"

"Can you prove it in court? This might be rough...if they can get the sympathy of the jury...you might want to just settle. Especially since Carl already has."

"Yeah, but he's rich! What did he settle for?"

"Oh, he paid the full hundred thousand. So now it's you they're after."

"But I can't afford that!" I moaned, "It'll completely bust me!"

I called up the twins that evening. Jeff answered.

"I can't talk to you about the case, " he said, "my lawyer said absolutely not."

"Well...actually, I just wanted to invite the two of you over for dinner."

"Dinner? What for?"

"I don't know...for old times sake, I guess."

"But we can't do that..."

"Sure you can. Don't worry, we won't talk about the case."

"Forget it."

"Okay, but I think I'll make it anyway in case you change your mind. I've got a new tacquito recipe I want to try."

I heard him gasp softly.

"No way..." he said.

"Whatever. Seven o'clock, if you change your mind."

They showed up at seven on the dot.

"I don't know what you're up to, " said Joey, "but whatever it is it won't work. We're not going to talk about the case."

"Fine, " I said, "just have a seat. Everything's ready."

They ate with great gusto, occasionally moaning softly with pleasure. We made a little small talk, but mostly they just ate.

Finally they got up to leave.

"Will I see you at lunch tomorrow? Noon?"

They looked at me in amazement.

"No way!" said Joey, "we'll see you in court."

But of course they did show up for lunch, as well as dinner, and lunch and dinner the next day.

By that time their personalities had changed back to pleasant again.

Half an hour into dinner Joey looked at his watched, quickly said good-bye and raced out.

"God, he'll kill me if he finds out I was here, " he said.

"What's he talking about?" I asked Jeff after he left.

"His boyfriend--he promised not to gain anymore weight."

"I see. Have you lost much weight?"

"Not much. Actually, we're not try--oops!"

He looked at me, startled.

I smiled, somewhat bitterly no doubt.

"I imagine you have to keep your weight up for the trial, " I said, "it would be hard to convince a jury that you'd suffered damages if you got thin again."

Jeff winced.

"I can't talk about it, " he said.

"I know...but Jeff, this will break me! Even if I win the trial, the legal costs are outrageous."

"It's Joey, " said Jeff, "he needs money--he wants to get married. I don't mind that you fattened us up. I was just mad that you stopped..."

"I thought you two were loaded."

Jeff shrugged.

"Not really. We inherited that house, and enough to get by on, but we have to be pretty careful with our money if we don't want to dip into the capital."

Suddenly I had an idea.

"I know!" I said, "Let Carl settle with Joey, and I'll settle with you."

"You mean Joey gets Carl's hundred thousand? What do I get?"

We met with the lawyers the next day.

"Let me see if I understand" said the twins' lawyer, "Joey gets the hundred thou (less my fees), but Jeff pays my fees out of his own pocket? And he gets fattened up more?"

"Right, " said Jeff, "Sam has to feed me for five years or until I gain sixty pounds, whichever comes first."

"Why until you gain sixty pounds?"

"I want to make sure he has an incentive to feed me really well, " said Jeff with a grin, "this way, the better he feeds me, the sooner he gets out of the contract."

"This is the craziest thing I've ever heard, " said his lawyer.

"That's irrelevant, " said my lawyer, "a settlement is a settlement."

A condition of our contract was that I got to weigh Jeff whenever I wanted to. I weighed his the next day before lunch (I'd decided to just feed his lunch and dinner--he never had much of an appetite for breakfast anyway).

"Wow, only 182, " I said, "have you been on a diet?"

"No...but if it's not your cooking, it just doesn't seem like it's worth eating."

I served his the first course--he ate ecstatically, giving out little gasps and moans of pleasure.

"I've missed this so much!" he said.

I weighed his two weeks later.

"God, you look so good in that jock, " I told his, "I should weigh you every day, so you'd wear it all the time."

"You're just saying that, " he said, smiling and getting on the scale.

"195--all right, a new record!" I said, "no, I'm not just saying that. I prefer heavier men."

"Well, I guess that's not too surprising, " said Jeff.

"And I like helping them get heavier..."

"Well then what are we waiting for? I'm hungry!"

He was too...he was so eager to start eating that he didn't even bother to change out of his jock.

His appetite was terrific. He ate steadily for almost two hours.

Finally he sat back and sighed happily.

"I want to try something, " he said, "could you weigh me again?"

He was five pounds heavier from all the food he'd eaten. His belly was noticeably bigger. I couldn't help but gape at it.

"You like my belly, don't you?" he said.

"Yes, " I said.

"Do you want to touch it?"

"God, yes, " I said, fondling it gently.

He touched my raging hard-on through my pants.

"Wow! You really like it!" he said.

"Why are you teasing me? I thought you weren't interested!"

"Well, I didn't tell you the truth, exactly, " he started kissing me.

"What was the truth?" I said after some terrific kisses.

"Well, I was kind of interested, but Joey had a crush on you, so I felt like I couldn't respond."

"What! But I thought he had a boyfriend!"

"Oh, no, we made up the boyfriend...we hoped Carl would react the way he did and you two would want to feed us for another month. Anyway, by the time he really got a boyfriend, I was so fat I thought you wouldn't be interested."

"Boy, you sure got that wrong, " I said, pulling off his T-shirt, "Oh wow...your tummy isn't the only thing that's grown..." I said, awed by his luscious pecs. We made love...it was incredible.

It was a little over a year later. Jeff waddled up to the scale and peered sadly over his now ample pot-belly as the scale climbed to 253.

"Well that's it, " I said, "sixty pounds. The contract is fulfilled."

"Why did I say sixty pounds?" he moaned, "I should have said a hundred...or one-twenty, maybe. Yes, that would be about right. Sure you don't want to keep fattening me up, just for fun?"

"No time, " I said, "I've spent a year now fattening you up...it was fun, but I've got to make some money."

"Have you got a job yet?"

"Well, I've got a couple of consulting things that may happen in a couple of weeks or so."

"What if I pay you to keep fattening me up? With incentives of course, for every pound..."

We talked about it, but he couldn't afford to pay me as much as I wanted to make.

"How about until you find a job?"

"Sure, " I said, "why not?"

Joey came by the next day as Jeff was stuffing himself on lasagna and French bread.

"Looks good, " said Joey enviously, "but you're getting awfully fat, boy."

Jeff shrugged.

"If I had it to do over again, I would in a minute. Have you forgotten how good this food is?"

"No, " said Joey, smiling, "I don't blame you. But wait a minute...aren't you about done with your contract? You must have gained pretty close to sixty pounds by now."

"Sixty-three as of this morning. The contract is over--now I have to pay him."

"Really? How much?"

"Well, I pay him my weight twice a week, and a hundred-dollar bonus every time I gain a pound."

"Is that all? Hey, I'm in!"

"Really?"

"Sure!"

I had been listening in on this.

"But what about your boyfriend, Joey?" I asked him, "or does he like fat boys?"

He hadn't married the guy he'd been with during the lawsuit and had actually had two or three boyfriends since then.

"Gee, " he said, pretending to ponder, "lousy sex, fantastic food, lousy sex, fantastic food...how will I ever decide?"

"Do it, Joey!" said Jeff, "just think, we can be identical again!"

"I don't know if I'm going to get that fat, Jeff, " said Joey laughing, and sitting down at the table and looking at me.

"Feed me!" he said.

"We have to weigh you first!"

He was down to 192. He returned to the table and eagerly started feeding.

"Oh, Jesus!" he gasped. Then he turned to Jeff, "Maybe I will get that fat, after all."

"If you do have trouble with your sex life, I'll share Sam with you." said Jeff.

"What?" I said, not believing my ears.

"Why not? We've shared boyfriends before."

Joey looked at me appraisingly.

"Is he any good?" he asked.

"Are you kidding? He's great!"

The twins weren't into orgy scenes--and neither was I--but they didn't mind playing certain games...I loved to start making love with Joey and then having Jeff replace his in the middle, so I could pretend my slim lover with the flat tummy and hard pecs had suddenly become fat, with a large belly and breasts like honeydew melons. Or making love to one brother as I watched the other eat.

The first week alone, Joey gained five pounds and Jeff six.

"Jesus, Jeff!" I said, "I thought you were reaching a plateau!"

"Well, I've been holding back for some time now...I was putting off gaining the sixty pounds. But now I can eat all I want!"

"I'll never catch up with you at this rate, " said Joey, playfully poking his brother's fat belly.

"Yes you will. I've decided to start taking it easy."

"I thought you were going to start taking it easy, " I asked Jeff an hour later, as he polished off the tenth course of his lunch.

Joey had had to quit after eight courses.

"Maybe tomorrow, " he said, contemplating his distended belly, "But now I want another course. Your cooking just gets better and better. I just don't want to stop eating."

"I can't wait until my appetite is as good as yours, " said Joey enviously.

"It's like anything else, " said Jeff, starting on his eleventh course, strawberry shortcake, "you just have to practice!"